From the Desk of President Donald J. Trump
“My fellow Americans, Patriots, supporters, and haters – after Belfort and Holyfield, I really found my passion, a passion that requires a great STAMINA – big league!
“I am very happy to bring you this morning my take on last night’s heavyweight battle – a battle that took place in Grundy, Virginia – great place, phenomenal place. A battle of two killers, two tough guys – former Virginia Governor ‘Two-Face’ Terry McAuliffe, and ‘Dunkin’ Glenn Youngkin – and boy, did Terry get his clock cleaned. Wasn’t even close.
“Now, I know Terry – used to come to my vineyard, begged me to come to Virginia. I’ve known him for years, and the guy loved to tell everyone that we are friends, told everyone back in New York, D.C. Begged me for money – begged like a dog. Now, the guy’s a hater. Can you believe that? So much for loyalty. Total loser.
“Terry acted like he was never Governor before, he was jumpy, jittery – saying he will bring people together, while he pushes vaccine mandates, mask mandates, and defending third trimester abortions.
“So crazy -so unbelievable. He kept trying to swing at Glenn – ‘Dunkin Youngkin’ as people call him – but Glenn kept brushing him off,
completely blocking Terry when he tried to hit him with lies about his record – so many lies. His accomplishments are minimal and he tried to hide from the fact that he dumped criminals, so many, on the streets.
“Glenn, who’s a good guy, who stood up to China, Carlisle Group – great group that Terry invested in by the way, looked right out of Central Casting. Totally has the look of a Governor.
“He was able to power forward with a positive vision about a booming economy, and making Virginia the best place to raise a family and work – so important. He was able to reject the false claim that he agrees with what’s going on in Texas. He totally reminded me of Reagan, who I met by the way, when he told Carter, ‘There you go again.’
“Terry tried to say Glenn is a Trump wannabe – the only person to be Trump is Trump, ok? No one can ever do it like Trump. I wish the guy luck, he came away cool and confident, with early voting right around the corner folks. It was Glenn, by a knockout.
“Before I go, can we talk about the real killer, Susan Page? Both guys could barely finish a sentence, so crazy! Cut everyone short, so unfair. Should’ve been more like Chris Wallace!”