Where Has Our Compassion Gone?
There are few threats as great to the continued success of our American experiment than our loss of compassion for one another.
Compassion, at its most fundamental, is sympathy – it is empathy and a willingness to try to understand what another person is going through. Whether it’s the loss of a family member, fear of a disease or disaster, or merely a willingness to accept and understand the emotions of another, compassion is something we as Americans embrace as a core virtue. “With malice towards none, with charity for all,” has long been a fundamental American value, even before those words were spoken by our greatest leader in our greatest time of need.
Compassion has been hard to come by this week. Our seeming unwillingness to walk a mile in the shoes of our fellow man cropped up almost immediately after the police-involved shootings in Louisiana and Minnesota. On one side, the police were immediately declared guilty and pilloried, without having their side of the story heard. At the same time, on the other side, a mass of internet trolls raced to their screens to research the backgrounds of the two dead men to find every negative thing they could to besmirch their names, as if that somehow justified their deaths. Criminal histories, Facebook photos, and agenda laced articles written and shared to prove the other side was wrong sprouted like mushrooms after a week of rain.
And when a murderer decided to take advantage of the unrest to kill five policemen in Dallas, instant recriminations flew. It was bitterly divisive and it remains that way, because we can be sure that in the midst of this election season, both sides will try to use these events to divide us for their personal electoral gain.
What is missing in all of these discussions is compassion. We aren’t putting ourselves in the car with Philando Castile. We aren’t putting ourselves in a uniform in Dallas watching as our colleagues fall under a hail of gunfire. We aren’t putting ourselves in the shoes of a black father trying to give his son “the talk” – a much different version of the “talk” than the one I received from my father. We aren’t putting ourselves in the shoes of a son watching his father put on a badge and go to work, saying a prayer that Dad makes it home tonight.
Some simply choose to ignore what is happening, believing that it has nothing to do with them and it’s nothing they have to worry about. They’re not black. They’re not a cop. It’s somebody else’s problem, and they’ve got their own. Yet no matter how hard some try to ignore it, this is a problem we all face. Justice, love, peace – these are all things we as Americans claim as universal desires and universal virtues. We live in a nation where people as unique as God has made us come together to form one. E pluribus unum – it’s not just a latin phrase on our coins. It’s the spirit of what America is and has always been – out of many, one.
Compassion is not considered a political virtue. George W. Bush, as president, advocated for what he called “compassionate conservatism.” As he said at the time, compassionate conservatism was based on a government that actively helped citizens who were in need, showing them compassion, but at the same time demanded measurable results. Today, the idea of compassionate conservatism is mocked by both the left and the right. The left argue that it’s a meaningless platitude mouthed by people who seem to think that compassion and meanness are synonyms. The right seems to think it’s a cop out buzzword for more and more paternalistic government – just an excuse to provide more tax money to those who don’t deserve it.
The problem with both arguments is they ignore what true compassion is and what it means. Compassion isn’t something government can hand out to the needy. It’s a connection between people – between individuals. A willingness to acknowledge the other as a fellow human being and to realize their sufferings, their pain, is something you can relate to and empathize with. The poorest person can have compassion for the richest. The least intelligent for the most. It’s all about allowing a connection to form between you and others, with a simple desire to treat another person like they are someone who has value.
Too often, these days, compassion is viewed as a weakness. Compassion is not weakness. It comes from strength. It comes from a source of bravery and a willingness to accept others and feel empathy and consideration for someone who is completely different from you, who may even hate you. Those who deserve compassion the least are the ones who need it the most. It is what we selflessly give to those around us, simply by virtue of who we are and what we strive to be. Compassion is a gift that anyone, rich or poor, black or white, citizen or non-citizen can give to another. We all need it and we can all give it, today more than ever. Yet in these times when compassion is so necessary, we find it more lacking in our neighbors than ever before. That must change.
Christians are taught compassion – it’s one of the things that makes our religion strong. Paul wrote in his letter to the Colossians to “[p]ut on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” Compassion is embodied in Christ’s parable of the Good Samaritan, and his admonition at the end of the story to “go thou and do likewise.”
It’s time for all Americans to take a step back and reflect on our lost compassion for our neighbors.
We need to find our compassion again. We cannot fix what is ailing America without it.
