In the fallout of the Koran burning, angry Muslims have desecrated a World War II burial site for British and Commonwealth soldiers who died in North Africa.
Clearly, this is our fault. I sincerely hope that the President writes a letter to the Queen in which he expresses his deepest regrets to Her Majesty for the desecration of the cemetery. It’s the least he could do.
After all, if American soldiers hadn’t inadvertently burned Korans that had been defaced by Islamic POWs, the cemetery wouldn’t have been defaced. And since we apologized to Hamid Karzai for the burning, which resulted in the deaths of at least four Americans soldiers, it seems only fair that we apologize for this desecration.
We all know how British handle things like the destruction of their property. The last time we were involved in something like this, something about some tea in Boston, they declared war on us. And when we told them to stop taking Americans captive on the high seas, they burned the White House and the Capitol. They’re really touchy.
I shudder to think what they might do because of something like desecrating one of the cemeteries of heroes who died defending the world from facism – none of us are safe. They could ship us all their dentists, or something even worse, like refusing to allow Simon Cowell to rip off their TV shows over here. Losing American Idol and X-Factor would be the biggest blow to American morale since Seinfeld went off the air.
It’s up to the President to defuse this situation because, in the end, this is all our fault. If we didn’t have troops in Afghanistan trying to prop up Karzai’s government and keep their country from falling back under the control of a regime that thinks teaching girls to read is way too cutting edge for comfort, we couldn’t be accidentally burning books their POWs defaced.
If the President won’t do it, I’ll do it.
Mrs. Queen, we’re sorry. Please don’t be mad.
