Today I have been greatly honored with the nomination of the Republicans of Virginia’s 79th district, and I hereby accept, with all the humility I can manage, your trust in me to run for and, voters willing, represent the 79th district in the United States House of Representatives!
How surprised I was by your nomination, and how my mind whirled as I drove down from Richmond to make this acceptance, crossing out of the 7th Congressional District where I live, and into my beloved (adopted) 79th. What a fantastic and challenging district! From its easternmost reach, on the beautiful Virginia shoreline, where if I am elected we will almost be able to see the hundreds of oil platforms that I will see to it are put out there; to the rugged beauty, only a stone’s thorw away from West Virginia, of the dairy cow covered pastureland that you see just before you pass the entrance to what will be, if I am elected, the world’s largest unobtainium mine; this district, the longest and narrowest in our Commonwealth, gerrymandered into a precarious existence yet so beloved by the diverse and good people who live there; this district can lead the Commonwealth into a better 21st century!
But first, jobs. There are so many people hurting. I think of Boyd Turlock, one of the first residents of the 79th I ever met. Oh, he took one look at my prepped-out Richmond clothes and decided I was just another politician. But I listened. Yes, that’s what people want – they want someone to listen to them. So I listened. And I learned. First I learned how to get back on Route 64. But then I learned that Boyd’s father had fought in World War II, then come back to the farm. He built a good life. But Boyd could see the frustration as his father dealt with the rules and regulations that big government put on his farm. He saw Boyd’s friends losing their factory jobs. Boyd worries that his children will have a hard time getting good jobs.
Boyd is also puzzled that with the tremendous natural resources of the 79th district we somehow aren’t allowed to use them. Do we not have offshore oil? Do we not have vast unobtainium deposits? Then why do we not use them, to benefit Virginia and the United States? Don’t we want to be more energy-independent? Don’t we want more jobs? Of course we do. Democrats will say that… but in vote after vote they vote the other way! Virginia, it’s time to elect someone who will fight for jobs and energy independence!
As your Congressional representative I pledge to:
1. Fight for jobs for the 79th;
2. Fight to use our natural resources to become more energy-independent;
3. Never phonebank, because I have better uses for your kind and generous campaign donations.
4. Track down the alleged 7 jobs that the Obama administration claims to have created or saved in the 79th district and be sure that everything there is in order.
Finally, I pledge not to go on a listening tour. I already have listened to you, or I wouldn’t be so inspired to run. Instead, with your help, I will go to Congress and MAKE THEM LISTEN TO YOU!
