LEAKED: Obama’s Speech to Schoolchildren

It took most of the weekend working sources throughout the political world, but instead of watching the ODU football game, I was hard at work trying to find an advance copy of Barack Obama’s speech to be broadcast at schools across America.

What I found had some edits, and it’s obviously not in finished form, but it’s actually a sobering and heartfelt message by a man who seems serious about the economic plight of our nation and the national debt.

Here’s what I found:

“Now, what I want you to do is tiptoe into the bedroom and don’t wake them up and you’ll probably see your mom’s pocketbook on the floor along with your dad’s pants. Now, be real careful, because we don’t want to wake them up, but I want you to go into your mom’s pocketbook and your dad’s pants and you’ll find some little green pieces of paper with pictures of guys with beards on them. Now, what I want you to do is take those little pieces of green paper and put them into an envelope, and on the envelope, I want you to write Soupy Sales The President, Channel 5 White House, New York, New York Washington DC.”

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About the author

Brian Kirwin

The right wants to jeer him. The left wants to censor him. Moderates usually want both. Brian Kirwin is a political consultant and public relations strategist in Virginia Beach with a lightning-rod flair. Brian also serves on the VB Arts & Humanities Commission and frequently appears on Hampton Roads theatrical stages, if only to prove that all actors aren’t liberals. Kirwin’s columns stir up debate and hit the political scene with no punches pulled.