HELP WANTED: Democratic Vice Presidential Nominee
By | Tuesday, July 29th, 2008 | Politics

NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY!!!

Qualifications:

  • Must have repeatedly failed to implement transportation plans.
  • Must have consistently fought for higher taxes.
  • Must call special sessions just for the heck of it.
  • Must include “International House of Pancakes” as foreign policy experience.
  • Must have both Democrats and Republicans opposing you.
  • Must answer to the phrase “that guy who served after Mark Warner.”
  • Must have blog named after you that then changed it’s name.

Eyebrows are a must!

If interested, contact the offices of Barack Obama for President.


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About the author

Brian Kirwin

The right wants to jeer him. The left wants to censor him. Moderates usually want both. Brian Kirwin is a political consultant and public relations strategist in Virginia Beach with a lightning-rod flair. Brian also serves on the VB Arts & Humanities Commission and frequently appears on Hampton Roads theatrical stages, if only to prove that all actors aren’t liberals. Kirwin’s columns stir up debate and hit the political scene with no punches pulled.

Comments

11 Responses to "HELP WANTED: Democratic Vice Presidential Nominee"
  1. Scott July 29, 2008 16:59 pm

    I’m thinking we could do something similar for Brownlee…

  2. Reid Greenmun July 29, 2008 18:10 pm

    Pretty funny – good one!

  3. Ron July 29, 2008 21:07 pm

    I’m jealous — You thought of this before I did. Good work!

  4. Ragnar July 29, 2008 22:06 pm

    I just want a President and VP who respect the Constitution, know how to win a war, are fiscally responsible, won’t run up $4,000,000,000,000 in debt, won’t destroy our economy, won’t illegally politicize government agencies…

  5. J.R. July 29, 2008 22:46 pm

    Ragnar,
    Get a sense of humor. Please.

  6. Ragnar July 30, 2008 00:16 am

    Wasn’t my response funny? Gee, I guess I don’t think trampling on the Constituion or prosecuting people for political reasons is funny either.

    Now GOP Sen. Ted Stevens being indicted? Priceless… and DAMN funny.

  7. Jeremy Hinton July 30, 2008 09:24 am

    So does that year of missionary work in Honduras for the Jesuits disqualify him as being having an overdeveloped foriegn policy resume? :)

    You also forgot – must dissavow any prior fondness for “townhall” meetings.

    Rumor has it Kaine may even get the nod today in misourri.

  8. Brian Kirwin July 30, 2008 10:28 am

    Is the job Ambassador to Honduras?

  9. Henry Ryto July 30, 2008 15:55 pm

    We did get something out of Kaine’s Transportation special session: HB 6028. [Henry laughs at Reid and the VBTA.]

    Brian,

    Why not? Kaine is one of the few liberal Democrats that could probably place Tegucigalpa on a map.

  10. Brian Kirwin July 30, 2008 16:47 pm

    Henry, I’d support him fully…..now! George W! Get on it.

  11. Squeaky Wheel August 1, 2008 11:53 am

    When you read Ragnar’s comment one has to assume that…ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz\

    :-)

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